The Best Ever Book of Swedish Jokes: Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who

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False. If nobody worked, the welfare state would cease to exist. The idea is that people who need help should be able to get it regardless of whether their income is high or low. The more people who contribute, the better the system works.

Mein Hund jagte immer Leuten auf dem Fahrrad hinterher,bis ich ihm das Fahrrad wegnahm! 10. TBH we don’t really get this one The father looks at him disapprovingly, “I’m ashamed of you! At your I age I never lied to my father!”. The detector beeps. The guy gets to the bar, and his friends ask why he’s so late. He tells them about the girl he found and all the different positions they tried out.

The phrase comes from Denmark and can be dated to the 1600s, although in Denmark it was “ulver” or “wolves” that were suspicious. And that makes way more sense, in my opinion. False. Sweden isn’t Narnia, even though it looks like it during the winter months. Winter is much longer than summer and some years it even snows in May! Most of the time though, Sweden enjoys lukewarm summers with the temperature around 23°C (73°F). Rest assured, the humor doesn’t end with the basics. Funny Swedish phrases, words and sayings are absolutely everywhere. Let’s take a look at 20 of them! 1. Pappaledig Extra funny Swedish word: Lattepappor (latte daddies). Because men who are “pappaledig” take their kids to cafes! I’m sure you don’t need telling that this is not true, but a staggering 46% of Swedes in one study had been asked this by a non-Swede. Sure, there are quite a few blondes in Sweden, but not everyone. Herr Doktor, Herr Doktor, ich hab jeden Morgen um 7 Uhr Stuhlgang!”–“Ja, das ist doch sehr gut!”–“Aber ich steh erst um halb acht auf!” 8. Nothing like a little divorce humor

Du har inte alla .rar-filer i releasen = “You don’t have all the .rar-files in the release” (alludes to not having all the tools or elements necessary to complete the task at hand) One recent post on Fullständigt ointressant information, where users compete to share the dullest possible anecdotes or insights, sums up a certain brand of Swedish humour. An old woman drinks whisky for the first time. She thinks for a while, and then says: “Strange, the stuff tastes exactly like the medicine my late husband had to take for twenty years!” It’s a well-known unwritten law across this globe of ours that one must learn how to insult someone and swear in a foreign language before one truly is accepted among the locals. My Grandpa said, “Your generation relies too much on technology!” I replied, “No, your generation relies too much on technology!” Then I unplugged his life support.

In Britain, there's a great love of ribaldry, humorous repartee in the pub, or more recently on the Whatsapp groups that groups of friends have set up to replace it. This Swedish-Norwegian war of words could be seen as just cheerful teasing between neighbours, but it also ought to be viewed against their 1905 partition, when the two countries separated under not entirely friendly terms. As per the venerable I was in ancient Rome listening to a stand-up comedian making fun of Caesar. The jokes weren’t that good, but I liked the execution. I also want to clarify that this list is not intended to offend or hurt anyone, but rather to shine a light on this lesser-known side of Swedish linguistics, as well as celebrate all the weird ways language can emphasize emotion and build relationships among us humans. So you could be “badsugen” (craving a swim), “matsugen” (craving food in general), or even “pratsugen” (desiring conversation).

During the 20th century Sweden transformed rather dramatically, from highly hierarchical to egalitarian,” Engman says. “Swedes tend not to tell jokes about the prime minister or politicians - you shouldn’t make fun of the leaders anymore.” They formed S.U.C.K (Stand Up Comedy Klubben) which soon found its home at Norra Brunn on Surbrunnsgatan and has since become Sweden’s comedy Mecca. Nowadays, Oredsson is something of a stand up veteran, with over 1,000 performances to his name. “I think the Swedes are rather funny and humour is a survival kit you need here.” Quite. Sometimes these, like other Norgehistorier or Svenskevitser, settle with characterising the neighbouring country as stupid, like this one: Listen to possibly most subjective episode of “Sweden And…” on iTunes or anywhere else where you get your podcasts. Danes and Swedes' jokes about the Norwegians tend to revolve around their excessive national pride, and also around their simplistic, literalistic use of language.

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And you shouldn’t use humour to make yourself look better than others.” Here we go again; that reccurring rule of Jantelagen just had to rear its ugly head somewhere. But, wait a minute. Another more contentious target group is immigrants. What was once a definite no-go area has become a way of breaking down cultural barriers. Özz Nujen is part of a new wave of comedians who, as second generation immigrants themselves, are making jokes at their own expense. There ́s no way she believed you!” He shakes his head again. “How old did you tell her you were, then?” I'm thinking about opening up a Swedish restaurant but my chef isn't actually Swedish Do you think anyone will notice I'm using an artificial Swedener on my food? Yes, this is (unfortunately) also kinda true. Two things to consider here: We don’t get a lot of sun in Sweden and alcohol is expensive and not as readily available as it is elsewhere in the world.

What is even worse than waking up after a party and finding a pen*s was drawn on your face? Finding out it was traced.Aspiring Swedish stand ups take note; Oredsson explains there are certain subjects that are off limits. “It’s okay to joke about the king being dyslexic,” he says. “But saying the same about the Crown Princess is not allowed. He’s safe on his throne but she’s young and vulnerable.” But Nujen’s style is not shy of controversy and there are those who definitely don’t see the funny side. “I’ve had death threats from Swedish racists, Muslims and Kurds – my own people,” he adds. The Spanish guy sitting next to her asks what's wrong and she replies that 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed in a drug bust. In his article, Grundelach, points out the strange asymmetry in Scandinavian humour, that while the Norwegians and Swedes joke about each other, and the Danes a little about both Swedes and Norwegians, no one seems to joke much about the Danes. In other words: when everyone has calmed down from whatever happened before the joke was made, there is less tension in the room, and it’s easier to laugh about it .